finding normal

I am still working on finding a normal relationship with food. I'm tyring to adjust back to a regular diet, but my body says no. I have serious stomach (and gas....mainly gas) issues if I eat anything processed. I thought if I gave it time I would readjust, but its not working out. So not by choice, but for the greater good of humanity, my fellow workers at school, and as a last resort- I'm back to eating clean. I can eat as much brocolli as I want and have no problems, but slip in a piece of bread and I'm a disaster. I've been trying to blame as many farts on Flash and my students as I can, but it is just ridiculous.
Enough about that.
My chickens are all doing well. They poop A LOT. I've had relative success so far. I've only lost one. My latest addition to the flock happened last night. I bought two turkeys and four ducks. I also snuck in two more baby chicks, but those are on the hush hush.

I did not get into the Mt. Marathon race. GD bastards. I'm torn between just running the race anyway as a bandit, saying piss off to the whole event, or going and buying a ticket at the auction. But I desperately need something to train for, or a new hobby of some sort. I am thinking about taking up swimming. When asked who I'd comepete against in that, or what I would be training for my initial response was, London 2012, duh. Michael Phelps. Pshhaw. He's got nothing on me. I meant to go swimming this morning but I forgot about an early meeting and had to postpone my olympic training a day. However, I am still looking for some sort of hobby/event to train for. All suggestions are welcome.

characteristic immoderation

I made the cake pops. Well, I had the kiddos at school make them. It was hardly controlled chaos, but they did turn out. I didn't eat any, but they were visually satisfying.
Last Friday I decided I am not doing the May show. I am retiring from the world of body building. Going out on top. I am still working on developing a normal relationship with food. Now lets talk about the effects of coming off of a super strict diet. I have been farting like no ones business. It is truly braggable and incredibly embarassing and hilarious all at the same time. I can't help but giggle every time I fart. Keep in mind these are not little lady like squeaks that just slip out. I am talking about the burliest of burly farts you've ever been around. It is like something has died and fermented in my gut and is causing some gastrointestinal phenomena.
Chicken update: they are hatching as I type.  I am going to go get them saturday. I'm so excited. The Coops almost finished, which doesn't really matter because they won't be out in it for at least another month. I have the little brooder ready for them. All I did was take a big rubbermaid tupperware and cut the lid off, staple some chicken wire over the top so the light can set right on it and put the feeder and waterer in there. Boom. brooder, done.
Garden update: I have started some vegetable and flowers in the greenhouse. I also took a tarp off and found this huge water fountain thing. It's pretty huge and tacky, I kind of love it.
Nicole and I just got asked to help out with Prom this weekend. Its our fourth year as coat check. We're pretty much pros at hanging up coats and what not. But, we're going to go look at dresses today at the one and only dress shop in the area. The little ladies out there love us. Every year they give me a VIP card which grants me an additional 15% off. I've never used it. But I like the idea of having it.
Did I mention 28 more days of school left. woot woot!

cake pops

I'll admit I have an obsessive tendency. I stopped by JoAnne's Fabric store yesterday(after the gym) and came across this book called Cake Pops, written by Bakerella. Here's her website, she's fantastic.  It's all about cake on a stick. And they are so stinking cute. I can't stop thinking about them. Its not even the eating them part, I just want to make them. The rational part of my brain....which is very small now that I'm on day 5 of low/no carbs....says this is not a good idea. But I have a 9 year olds birthday party to go to on Saturday and I think some cake pops are in order. I can do this.

ketosis

The plan is for the next six weeks cycle my body through ketosis. Ketosis, as I understand it, is the state of being when your body burns fat for fuel instead of carbs. There are many great articles written about it that can explain it a lot better than I can. Here is my favorite so far.  Anyways, its very similiar to the Atkins diet, with a few changes here and there to fit my needs. But, holy crap does it work. It sounds fun too. Eat a lot of fat and loose weight. OK! But the reality is that my total calories haven't gone up, and since I'm eating much higher value foods, it means the amount of food has gone down. so...it might be fun to have two eggs and two sausage links for breakfast...but my lunch of one can of tuna and one tbsp of mayo leaves a bit to be desired. But I'm dropping weight like crazy again. Which is good, because in the few days that I was off of the plan I gained a crap ton of weight. I know most of it was water weight from right after the show but still it is scary to see the scale jump up twenty pounds in two days. Plus, I just felt gross in my own skin. Like I was bloated against myself. I told Darin about this feeling and he said its normal, mainly because I was really bloated. My muscles were retaining every carb and every ounce of water I was putting back into my body. But since being on this new diet I've dropped back down to 172- which is still about ten pounds heavier than I was at the show, but I'm sure it'll come off. So anyways, I'm doing three low carb days followed by one high carb day, then two low carb, one high and that's what I'm doing for three weeks. Then I have my keto run which is 14 days of low/no carbs. whoa. and then peak week right before the show. This is officially phase two of the science experiment on my body.

chicken news: two weeks until hatching!

cabin news: the cabinets are in place, trim is painted and hung, upstairs bathroom is ready to be painted. its coming together quite nicely. you should all come and visit. book it.

we need a plan

I emailed Darin and told him I was in for the May show but that I wanted to be leaner. He said he has a plan that we need to discuss to change my diet around so that I burn more fat. Well shoot, that sounds great. Why wasn't I doing this before? I'm sure it's going to suck a lot. Darin's ideas are never fun. But I'm super curious as to what the changes are going to be.

May 14, 2011

I'm doing the show. 6 weeks from Saturday. Here we go again....

now what.

The show came and went very fast. The entire week before the show was not fun. I really don't remember much, it's almost like I was black out drunk the whole time. But I do know it was miserable. I don't think the carb cycling and water depletion really did that much for me anyway. If I did another show I think I would skip that part. The carb cycling for sure. And just do the water reduction right at the end. I think that would give me better results and be much more tolerable....for everyone.
The afternoon show was a blur. The poses were called so fast I couldn't harldy get into one before the next was already being called. I don't think I posed too well. But hey, I was the only one in my division and it was my first time. so...I guess it was ok. I just don't think I got lean enough. I still looked really heavy from the belly button down. Ugh. So if I do the May show I need to still cut weight and up my cardio and all I really want to do right now is binge out on the pot-luck going on in the teachers lounge. I ate two pieces of pizza saturday night. They were amazing. I could have ate a lot more. I easily could have finished the entire pizza, but I also didn't want to get sick. So I kept it in check. But my blood sugars were so messed up that I couldn't get to sleep until 2:30 in the morning and then I was up at 4, thinking about the waffles at the continental breakfast. I waited until 6 and went down to check out the waffle situation and they were out of batter. I almost burnt the place down with my rage. But instead  I went to breakfast at the Snow City Cafe- it was awesome. And I didn't get sick from it either. I was totally bloated and I've been making some pretty bad farts, but no explosive poops or pukes so I'm calling it a victory.
I went to the gym last night and ran two miles and lifted a bit and tried to work my abs, but I still felt too bloated. I couldn't breathe because my gut was in the way. Then when I came home my calves started cramping up really bad. I was a mess. I didn't make it to the gym this morning, but I'll go after school.
I'm technically back on the diet and training again. But I'm not sure about the show. I'm not sure this is my style.